Sunday
The day started off with me going for my long awaited haircut :) and I love my hair now cos it is shorter, fresher and younger look :) Went to Reds, Taka to cut, not so expensive after all after the discount from Citibank, less than $50 so quite ok :)
Next, went back to Kel's place to fetch his mum cos there was a extended family high tea session at Marriot Hotel. Was on the way there, when my maid called to says my sis's MIL ask me to go over for dinner, but hmmm cant I got to go to airport later the evening. I think the MIL will be abit disappointed ba cos my maid sound disappointed that I cant go over. The food at Marriot hmmm dont quite like in fact I tot it taste not so nice not to my liking I suppose. We were there for at least 3 hours I think from 3 plus till like 6.30pm then we left the place. Got to rush abit cos gonna go to Changi airport to send Gen off.
Gen went back to BKK last night, think will be missing her. She is one of the friend that I tried to send her off whenever I can and time allows. And she is also one of the few friends that I will call when I am sad, depress and happy. Miss her already :(
Sick AGAIN
I am sick ONCE AGAIN for the dont know how many times in these few months. The stress and presure in me must be too great.
I am worried that my voice will be gone cos I cant afford to lose my voice when my work require me to talk talk and talk :(
Going to cut my hair later too, been trying to do that for weeks yet no time plus dont know where to cut. I gonna go REDS later to cut, hope it will turn out to be nice else I will cry leh. First time my hair so long yet I want to cut, cos its too heavy and makes me look so tired. Pray for me that it be good :)
Theatrical Productions
Finally bought the tickets to the 3 Theatrical Productions that I want to watch on Wednesday I think. Wanna to blog on this but no time till now.
Feeling so happy and looking forward to the dates :) Hope they are good :) *fingers cross*
251 - Kel wanna watch this - Annabel Chong, the first porn star to come out of Singapore, she became one of the most internationally recognised Singapore icons, right next to the Merlion and Tiger Balm. Leading the provocatively talented cast is well known theatre and tv personality Cynthia Lee Macquarrie as Annabel Chong. - info from Sistic.com.
Blithe Spirit - This should be funny :) Directed by Glen Goei (Boeing Boeing, The Magic Fundoshi), this comic masterpiece stars Lim Kay Siu, Neo Swee Lin, Tan Kheng Hua, Selena Tan, Pam Oei, Gerald Chew and Celine Rosa Tan. -info from Sistic.com.
Broadway Beng Returns - Wanna catch this when it was just Broadway Beng shown last yr or so but then didnt managed to catch it so here the tickets to Broadway Beng RETURNS :)
Communication
It's already almost 4 AM and I still cant sleep a wink.......so much on my mind.....
Isnt a couple suppose to be able to communicate? But yet I cant whenever I face him. He just put me off from telling whatever that is bothering me, sad or happy. He just want to listen to happy things. Is he someone who can just share happy things with and not sad things? Isnt a couple suppose to go thru thin and thick together?
I am trying so hard to let myself open up to Kel, yet he just so..........
I really regret, regret trying to open myself up to Kel.......
I am one who want to solve everythg before it become a HUGH problem, he on the other hand is one who want to just put everythg aside and pile it up like a mountain and take it like there isnt any problem at all.
Is he cant be bother or just plain lazy?
How can one stay in this kind of relation when the gf tries so hard to communicate with the bf yet ended up being hurt with all his ******** remarks. And even let him said that why are you acting like a young girl, you think you are acting in a Drama or you watched too much Taiwan drama is it???
So what is these kind of crude remarks? Have he ever think how I feel when he pass all these remarks??? Maybe he should be the one to grow up and act like a man and stop running away from all the problems that we are having.
I am worried really worried that I will fall for another guy which I told him. And yet why isnt he do anythg to save the relation? Why is he still acting like that when I just pass a little remark that I think we are not spending enough quality time together just the two of us alone together? Why he got to presume and assume what I am thinking? Why is he doing these when he kept on saying I shouldnt presume and assume what he is thinking? Why cant he apply what he said to himself cos he is the one doing all those?
When was the last time I told him we didnt spend enough time alone together? It was ages ago.......but he said why I always must says all these........
I am tired really tired. Tired from having to face him.....
I am stress out really stress. Be it relation or work. I just cant make them work.
I am sad really sad. Cos Kel is not helping instead he is trying to make a bid deal out of it.
I am depress really depress.
I just want to be myself. I seem to be getting lost from my old self, the current me...I dont even know the current me, I am just like a stranger to myself. I seem to have become another person a person who Kel want me to be or have made me into?
I just want to sleep really sleep.
一秒的安慰
闭上眼就看见你的侧脸
这感觉像你还靠在我肩
沿着你眉间轻抚忧郁的眼
让失眠的我守在你的梦里面
想听见你的呼吸在耳边
这音乐能平静我的一切
Arghhhh
Damm I am hungry, angry and upset ya upset else I dont think I be crying right now this very moment.
After waiting for ages for Kel to wake up from his sleep guess what he told me. Mum not going out to granny plc yet, now cooking lunch, later going out then call me!!! Arghhhh!!! He didnt even bother to ask if I have eaten or hungry anot? He didnt even ask me want to lunch anot. So why am I waiting for him for hours till now? So just to hear him tell me my mum cooking lunch at home?
He didnt even bother to ask then hang up till I SMS HIM, WE HAVE OUR OWN LUNCH IS IT??? This will be the very last time I wait for him to have my breakfast, lunch and dinner!
Seriously I dont know what kind of bf am I having. Is he really the one for me? If I am really going to be with him, I think I got to really take some time to pei he his insensetive, insesiable whatever u name it.
Vday 2007
Valentine Day! It is a day to celebrate love I suppose, but then isnt everyday a valentine day if both are happy together?
I bought Kel a pair of cufflinks, are they pretty? I tot they look classy and prof for him.
Kel gave me a surprise for sending me flowers at my office but then it turned out to be not so surprise as I was going to the ladies when they flower guy approached me and asked where is this office unit *bleh* The little soft toy was another surprise he gave me in the car. Very soft and cute.
We just had a simple dinner at the seafood resturant at Toa Payoh Lor 8. Not really a two's person kind of dinner since it was just beside my brother In-Law shop, I had his 2 kids joined us since they havnt had their dinner. The kids love their prawns and crabs. For me they were just ok so I just wondered why are there so many ppl that come here for the crabs, must be in luck. Pics of the plc and food as below.
静静的
空气里躲着什么
有点浪漫的心动
我偷偷看你
你也偷偷看我
世界上多了什么
好像变得很不同
站在你身边
这一切都好宽阔
我还在等着你
静静的爱我
只要有你陪我
静静的就足够
你也在等着我
静静的温柔
就这样手牵手
静静的看着天空
心里面藏着什么
你只想要让我懂
原来我的梦
也就是你的梦
哦
纸条上写了什么
我好想要听你说
让字字句句
充满我们的笑容
永远要记得那天彼此许下的承诺
瞬间点亮的火花
是我们的拥有
静静的手牵手
是最简单的梦
What a night
Talked on the phone with Sharon for like more than an hour just now.
Was feeling so down and sad, it was so dramatic I felt (no details cos dont wan to make myself go thru the sad feeling again). Msg Sharon to see if she was free to talk but she was at church having class so didnt want to distrub her. After 10 mins or so, my hp rang and it was her, I felt so happy when I heard her voice and straight away she knew I sounded different and was like crying. Sometime, it's really good to have such a good and close fren who knew you well. And I was really glad that she was there for me just now.
Thanks Sharon!!!
有一天我会
有些事我没说但我有感觉
有些事我没说但我知道结果
有一天我会插上翅膀飞
有一天我会张开双眼看
有一天我会见到我的梦中有谁
有一天我会飞过世界的背
当太阳升起的那一天你再看我一遍
你将会发现我所有的改变
Gym
Woke up early AGAIN but not as early as the last few days, it was 5.30 AM today :) Should be happy that I managed to slp a tiny bit more right?
Feeling great right now cos I am looking forward to my bodycombat class later at Fitness First :) Actually, when I signed up for my membership, I thought it will be big big challenge to be able to drag myself to the gym everyweek but in the end I realise that wasnt the case and infact I look forward for it everytime, hope I will continue to have this kind of feeling throughout the 13 months :)
Started my membership last week and I already been to the gym quite a few times :) I love their bodycombat and muay thai classes. It was a great workout and I felt that while doing that I am able to let out my stress, just continue kicking and boxing like nobody business.
Dont the pic below look good? The pic showing bodycombat :)
What will bodycombat do for me? Its all spell out below :)
I wanna add another, that is able to realise stress while doing bodycombat :)
Multiple Personalities Disorder
OK I am blogging at an unearthy hour again (4.10am)!!! I just cant slp, think my conditions getting worst ya?
Looking at the title, you must be thinking I am having the mentioned disorder? Hahaha no lah, it's just the title of Hossan Leong's New Psycho Stand-Up Comedy which I watched with Sean last night :) The performance was GREAT and FUNNY :) Everyone was laughing non-stop and I felt the money was worth while :)
Synopsis (
www.sistic.com.sg)
Hossan Leong is the uncivil servant in charge of the newest Ministry department, set up to lure foreign talent to our fair shores. Going for glamour, he tries his best to convince International Personalities to come set up home in Singapore!When his time runs out and he has nothing to show for, he turns Absolutely Schizo! Hossan starts to morph into some of the entertainment scene's most popular icons!One moment he's a down and out Barry Moneylow auditioning for the National Day Parade. Next, he's Whitney Whoseturn lamenting her marriage woes as she waits in line at immigration. Blink, and he's Kenny Rogered Chicken, waxing lyrical about country music and Hainanese chicken. Poof! It's Hossan as Prints! The artist formerly known as a symbol, trying out a new career in graphics for Singapore¿s many campaigns!Hossan Leong, the funniest "split" personality in Singapore, takes stand-up comedy to riotous new heights. It's New! ... and definitely INSANE! Hossan Leong is the uncivil servant in charge of the newest Ministry department, set up to lure foreign talent to our fair shores. Going for glamour, he tries his best to convince International Personalities to come set up home in Singapore!
When his time runs out and he has nothing to show for, he turns Absolutely Schizo! Hossan starts to morph into some of the entertainment scene's most popular icons!One moment he's a down and out Barry Moneylow auditioning for the National Day Parade. Next, he's Whitney Whoseturn lamenting her marriage woes as she waits in line at immigration. Blink, and he's Kenny Rogered Chicken, waxing lyrical about country music and Hainanese chicken. Poof! It's Hossan as Prints! The artist formerly known as a symbol, trying out a new career in graphics for Singapore¿s many campaigns!Hossan Leong, the funniest "split" personality in Singapore, takes stand-up comedy to riotous new heights. It's New! ... and definitely INSANE!Guess what is inside???
Two tickets to Multiple Personalities Disorder :)
Bought the tickets from sistic on Tuesday cos it was only then that I decided to watch it. When Sean suggested on Sun, I didnt want to watch but after much thinking, I tot why not since it been so long since I last share an outing with a friend not to mention a guy friend. And I really hope I be able to let go of my stress to really enjoy my show and outing. Lastly, he be going back to Aussie next Thursday so it be like at least 6 months or a year before I get to catch up with him. Therefore, the tickets to the performance :) Feeling happy :)
He came to fetch me from work at around 6 PM, kind of not used to what he wear cos he was in shirt and jeans, I always see him in tshirt and bermudas hahaha and I kept telling him hey u look strange and I not used to it. We made our way to the National Library Drama Centre, he was funny trying to make me laugh along the way. It was really so long since I last meet a guy friend to watch a performance in terms of years. Sean made a few wrong turns and missed the entrance for the carpark but it was ok since still early. He let me choose where to dinner and we ended up in Hoshigaka (think shld be this spelling). I ordered shabu shabu and him, sashimi. Food came, he being a gentleman and caring guy kept on taking food for me from his set and of course he knew that if he dont take the food and put it on my bowl, I wouldnt touch his. Anyway the food sucks lah and he told me dont eat, later after the performance then he bring me to eat other things. Both of us were really diasppointed with the quality, and swear that we will not go back there again. Did a little bit of window shopping before proceeding to the Drama Centre. Both of us were stuck at the kitchenware corner, incase you dont know, both of us love to cook :) and Sean a good cook too :)
I have always enjoy watching stage performance but I didnt have much chance watching considering the amount that ticket cost and me being fussy didnt want to get other cheaper ticket apart from the most expensive cos you get better view isnt it? Else what for go and watch the performance. And also dont think Kel would have this kind of interest, he would most properly fall aslp esp on performance like Miss Saigon? The first and only one I watched was Miss Saigon and it was liked years ago with Sharon :) It was good :)
This was my 2nd show and I hope there will be more coming, the next one I wanna watch will be Broadway Beng, Sean told me the 1st time round of Broadway Beng was quite good and funny. So I hope I be able to catch the 2nd round in May.
Anyway, after the performance, Sean wanna bring me to the Steamboat shop of his friend but hmmm he looked at his watch and knew that I wouldnt have enough time for that so we had the famous wanton noodles opp bugis junction instead. He was really caring, I was trying to pull open my can of coke when he just take over and opened it up for me even poured it into the cup ok lah I know this was nothg new lah but I just enjoy the feeling of being treat like a GIRL!!! Wanton noodles came, I didnt ordered one as I was not so hungry so Sean made me eat some of his, felt the noodles was abit hard otherwise it was ok :)
We took a slow walk back to the carpark, had more chat and it was really good and enjoyable and I love the cool wind blowing at us while we walked. Maybe, after 4 hrs together, both of us start to relax and walked side by side else it was like either he walked infront or behind never beside me. I felt strange when I first meet him earlier cos I have not gone out with a guy which is not my BF afterall for so long and dont know how to react.
Reached home feeling so tired but I was happy and enjoyed myself.
Wide Awake
I have been losing my sleep these days, everyday I slp like less than 4 hours :( Just like right now, it's only 4 plus in the morning and I am wide awake.
There are just so much things in me that I felt it is overflowing and isnt any more space to fill it with new things.
More stress will be coming today as new event is starting today :(
Why are there so many things I have to think about?
Kel wasnt helping me much too by adding more quarrels and not being a understanding bf on top of my already overstress and pressure condition. Sometimes, I just hope and wish why cant Kel treat me the same like 5 years ago when we were just started out? Why cant he be the sweet old Kel? Last time, I enjoyed every moment with him, started missing him the moment I'm not with him. Why cant things be the same? Then now, we wouldnt have so much problems and keep on quarrelling. Is it when a relation staying at a stage for too long, and didnt proceed on to next stage, it will get sour? He's just different from the guy 5 years ago. Now he just wanna to show who is the boss? I am sad, yeah I am really am. Even the thought of marrying him is drifting further and further away cos I am just too afraid to commit. I no longer can see the future, building a family together and us getting old together. These thoughts are just further and further away till I just want to shut them out now. You know, at times when I looked at him, be it in the car or he's slping in his room/car, my tears would suddenly flow down and I just turned away before he saw that. I just so sad that he changed so much. I just want my old Kel back. Is that too much to ask for?
These days, I really do cry alot cos I just cant take it anymore. At times, I can just out of sudden be crying when I reached home, close my room door. Am I going into depression again like I am back in Aust, the very first semester with my cousin? I am worried about myself, I need Kel to help me with this but right now I think that's so hard isnt it?
All I want is just to relax and enjoy my time without having to think of all the problems I am having.
Pretty?
Isnt the sky pretty? This was in Brissy, Aust.
