Marriage
Have you all ever wonder how you BF will propose to you, when you be getting marry, how your wedding will be like, how to renovate and decor your own place and have a child of your own?? Well, a matter of fact, I do. By the time I finished with poly education, I tot it would be good if I can get marry at the age of 25, a fairytale proposal and wedding and have a child by 27-28. Well, I guess all those is just my side of pure dreaming or daydream or better english would be building castle in the air :)I am already sad and disappointed enough that I am not able to do all those that I mentioned above but at least I tot my guy would give me some kind of security, closeness, understanding, concern and action to let me know "Ya, we be having a future together, we will be building our family soon and I already started to plan for our future together". But I never did feel anything from him, all he did is ya I will ask my mum, ya I will ask my friend about his wedding etc etc. Pure talking doesnt make a different from no talking. So he might as well dont talk when he not prepare to do so. I never let him know I was sad and disappointed till last night.
I found out that my friend, a wealthy rich spoilt guy has proposed to his GF. YA EVEN A RICH SPOILT GUY KNOWS HOW TO PLAN AND SURPRISE THE GF and not my BF!!! Guess what Kel told me after I told him abt how this guy propose to the GF? He rich what of course he can bring the GF to concert, ask ppl to arrange then he go up to the stage and propose to the GF. Maybe he didnt get the meaning of why I telling him (Ok even when I told him straight at his face he still dont understand cos he still saying he rich of course can do all kinds of things). Let me get this straight, I am not talking about how rich this guy is and can do expensive thing to propose to the GF. The main thing is HE IS PUTTING EFFORTS, TIME AND ACTION TO SHOW THE GF HE IS SINCERE AND HE TRUELY WANT TO SPEND THE REST OF HIS LIFE WITH HER AND START A FAMILY WITH HER!!! That the main idea I want Kel to get into his brain. And not me the GF telling him for months, hey you ask your mum already not how many tables for dinne, hey where is the budget plan that I ask you to plan since dont know how many donkeys months. All he could tell me was I get a job liao, know how much I earn per month then I do the budget and now after he found a job, the reason he gave me was I dont even know how much is the bridal package, how you want me to budget? Why you get angry over these kind of things??
TMD!!! You got friends who are married lor!!!
His reply: I sms JQ liao what he no replied.
My reply: comeon lor u sms just once out of so many months. Cant you just call him up. That what you always tell me when I sms my fren what, why dont you just call them, why sms they dont reply wat!!!!!
His reply: I asked you to call Melissa liao what! Why you dont call!!!
My reply: Why must I call? Why must me the GF always do all the things??? Why cant you call JQ yourself, ask him out yourself? Why you must always says Melissa? When you sad you know how to call up ur buddy to come out, why now you cant call JQ up and ask him out to meet you???
Basically I wasnt angry, I was too sad and disappointed, in fact I was crying when I get to know that the rich guy proposed to the GF. I was too sad to even talked to Kel on the phone cos I am still crying and was crying even harder why he just dont understand why I am sad (he said I am angry) Kel dont even know I am crying all he know was to says why you so angry, angry for what and for the dont know how many times I just feel he never understand me to know if I am angry or I am crying or I am sad. I just want to put the phone down and cry myself to sleep but Kel is just Kel, he doesnt want to put the phone down and keep on going on and on with his great reasons, explaination etc etc etc kept forcing all the things into me. Maybe I should act just like him, and see how he feels when I dont bother about this relation, never raise a question on the wedding and closeness topic etc etc.
Seriously, if these kind of things is going to continue and I am always the one who keep on asking and doing all the things, I dont think I want to get marry anymore. Beside he never even PROPOSE TO ME!!!!!! I NEVER EVEN SEE HIM PUTTING EFFORT INTO ANYTHING ON WEDDING, CLOSENESS ETC.
Finally he put down the phone after going thru all his nonsense and rubbish DA DAO LI for dont know how long and how many times. And I am stil crying.
And it didnt get any better when the TV is showing a programme on helping this guy proposing to the GF of 5 years!!!!! Arghhh it was just not my day. The proposal was so sweet and touching that it really melt my heart if I am the GF(the GF was crying cos of the surprise and effort that the guy put in) well a matter of fact I am crying too cos I who was not in any part of that show was touch too so how can the GF not be touch. My brain at that moment just kept on functioning and telling me, dont expect too much from Kel, the more you expect the more disappointed you are, maybe you should just dont expect any kind of proposal from him cos might not be one afterall. He just a boring guy who dont put in efforts even when this kind of thing, a wedding is so IMPT TO a couple cos it is once a lifetime thingy..........
posted by Tritri @ 2:20:00 AM
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